On Going to Church...

-photo from our home church-

I've recently come across a couple of blog posts that I really liked regarding the topic of "going to church."  This is a topic that is close to my heart.  I grew up in church - the daughter of a baptist preacher.  Yep, I'm a P.K.  Church has always been a big part of my life.  Growing up, I went with my parents on Sunday mornings, Sunday nights, and Wednesday nights.  I was a member of youth group as a teen.  Church was just a natural part of life and I'm forever grateful for that gift.  However, I know this isn't the case for many.  I know that some of you struggle with church attendance for many reasons - busy work schedules, challenging with little kids, bad church experiences in your past, or not having ever really attended and it not being at all comfortable or natural for you... among many other possible reasons.

Our home church is in our hometown and is the church that my dad is the pastor of.  However, we have lived an hour away from there for the past five years.  Over these five years, we have attended a big non-denominational church.  We loved the worship and the pastor there - his sermons were awesome.  The problem was that we just didn't ever get plugged in or connected.  After we had Holden, we went and wrestled him during service or went to the cry room because we didn't want to leave him in child care.  Eventually, we did put him in childcare - some time after turning one.  But childcare there seemed chaotic, overcrowded, and just not right.  When I dropped him off, nobody really greeted us or paid him any special attention.  I think it was just too crowded.  So, because we never wanted to take him to child care we basically started only going to church when we were back "home-home."  On "off-weekends" we watched a church service on television.  This continued after having Brooks.

That seemed fine for a while... but I really missed BEING IN church.  I missed the worship aspect.  And isn't that really the biggest part?  Taking time out of your busy life to stop and worship Him?  I believe that the point of church isn't what you GET out of it... but what you GIVE.  The point of church is not to serve yourself, but to serve HIM.  While I believe that you can worship God anywhere, it just didn't feel like enough to me.  And honestly, I wasn't worshipping while watching televised church at home.  I was distractedly watching/listening.  I wasn't singing Him praises and I wasn't truly having a heart of worship.  It was easy... but I know that the best things in life aren't easy.  Most of the time, if something is easy - you aren't doing it right or to your full ability.

I started considering going to a local church which is a branch/campus of another, very large church that is farther away in the "big city."  The main thing that was holding me back was that this campus' sermon is basically simulcasted from the main campus - ie.) the preacher is on screens, not actually in person.  Then one day, I was talking to my neighbor who is a previous co-worker of mine.  She told me that she attended there.  She explained that they have their own worship team and their own campus pastors who are there in person - they do not preach the sermon- but they handle other parts of the service and are there for all other pastoral aspects.  So, we decided to go to a Saturday evening service one evening when hubs was off work.  We checked both babes into childcare - which was immediately a better experience than at the other church.  The "class" sizes were smaller and the workers were very friendly, welcoming, and reassuring.  We really enjoyed the service!  It is still a big church but significantly smaller than the other. It is a much smaller, more intimate feel.  The worship was awesome and I barely even noticed that the pastor preaching the sermon wasn't actually there in person.  At the other church, we basically watched the pastor on screens anyway - because we were so far away from him in the huge crowd.  So it didn't feel much different.  We walked away feeling good about it.

I decided to waste no time getting plugged in this time around.  Bible studies/groups were starting a new semester the following week.  I e-mailed someone about getting involved with a mom's group.  Unfortunately, they were at capacity.  I asked if there were any openings in any of the bible studies with childcare provided - and one was suggested.  I asked a friend if she and her little girl wanted to join us and they did!  We were signed up and our first meeting was that Wednesday!

It has been going great so far and I honestly look forward to it so much each week.  It isn't easy to get out the door and to bible study by 9:30 a.m. with two littles by myself but we do it anyway.  And it is always worth it.  Brooks always cries when I leave him but then he is fine once I'm out of sight.  Holden sometimes cries when I leave him, as does my friend's little girl.  But my new motto is, "I can do hard things."  I am proud of us for taking the plunge and I give God all the glory!

The bible study we are a part of is kind of an overview of the Bible in eight weeks.  It's very interesting and I am learning so much.  Even though I have always gone to church, I feel like I am lacking in bible knowledge... and that is probably because I've never truly studied it.  That's changing now and I'm so happy about it.  There is also value in being a part of a community of believers - people to pray for you, support, and encourage you.  There are some older women in our group and I love that we are able to learn from them and from their example.  Many of them have been Christians all of their lives, and yet, there they are.  Still passionate about Jesus and still yearning to learn more.

If you are on the fence about going to church, I just want to encourage you to take the plunge.  Find a place where you belong.  Get involved.  I told a friend recently that I never regret going to church - only not going.  If you've considered it, discussed it, but just haven't done anything about it - just do something.  If you have to go alone, just go.  With other things in life that we really want, we make it happen.  We take the steps required to get what we want.  This should be no different.  The only difference should be the sense of urgency attached to it.  It is more important than the other stuff.  Don't wait.  Don't miss out on all that God has for you.  He is good and faithful.  He can give you peace, joy, and hope that you have never felt before.  He is the light of this dark world.

I often think that if someone I love who doesn't know Him or know him well... or someone who has been wanting to go to church but hasn't... wanted to give me a gift... the best gift they could give me would be to see them in church.  There is NOTHING that would make me happier.

For what it's worth.

And also, links to the blog posts I read recently.... others say it better than I can most of the time. ;)

http://www.kellyskornerblog.com/2014/02/so-you-want-to-find-church.html

http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/church/5-really-bad-reasons-leave-your-church

* The above is about "bad reasons to leave your church" but I think they can also be reasons why you never choose a church to begin with.  Could also be titled, "Bad Reasons to Just Not Go to Church."

Holden Update {Almost 2 and a half}

Recently when I was taking Brooks' 10 month photo, Holden jumped in the rocking chair and wanted to have his picture taken.  Him actually WANTING to have his picture taken is a very rare occurrance,

so of course I jumped on it.  Then I figured this would be a great time to do a little "Holden update."

Holden will be 2 1/2 next month - March 27th to be exact!  What in the world?  Didn't he JUST turn two?  I can't even process how fast these boys of mine are growing.

Oh, Holden... it is hard to sum you up into a blog post.  You are full of energy, life, spunk, and sweetness.  You are smart and so much fun.  

You love to sing.  You often play your drum while singing a song.  You will sing/play drum and then we clap and then you will come back to ask me what to sing/play next.  The songs you sing most right now are: Jesus Loves Me, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Twinkle Twinkle, Row Row Your Boat, Old MacDonald, and the ABC's of course.  You will also sing-count. 

Letters and numbers are your jam.  You still love letters - letter movies (Leapfrog/Scout movies are your fave), letter puzzles, letter books, saying and singing the alphabet.  You also know letter sounds and can identify/spell Mama/Dada/Baby/Gigi/Pappy/SoSo/cow/cat/dog/pig and probably a couple more that I'm forgetting.  You also love numbers.  You love to count - you can count from 1-20 and you can actually count things.  We have a new puzzle where one piece is a certain number of items which you count and then match up with the correct number on the other piece.  You do great with it and love it.  We are pretty impressed with your counting skills.  As someone who pretty much always loathed math, I hope your fascination with numbers is something that continues and that you never struggle with it.  Dada was always good at math - so I hope you get his math brains.

It has been a long winter - so cold, lots of snow.  This puts a damper on your favorite thing in life - which is to be outside.  We have hardly been outside for months!  It's so sad.  Not good for toddler!  If it warms up just a little, I try to get you outside.  You don't usually mind the cold and would probably stay out until you were frozen solid.  I can't wait until it is warmer again so we can have park playdates and spend lots of time in our little backyard.

Breakfast is still your favorite meal.  You always eat the most at breakfast.  Pancakes and waffles are still your faves.  Other non-breakfast favorites are fruit, macaroni and cheese, chicken nuggets, cheeseburgers (which you love but actually only eat the bun/cheese), french fries, gummies (fruit snacks), puffs and yogurt melts (thanks to Baby), pizza, quesadillas "tacos," bread, cheerios, crackers, goldfish, CAKE!  Basically all normal toddler favorites.  You still don't like veggies.  You won't eat anything green.  You drink 1% milk now.  You love milk and water.  You only have juice as a treat at someone else's house or if we are out.  Since you love milk and water and are perfectly happy with those choices, we would rather you not get addicted to sugary juice.

Your favorite shows include Dora, Paw Patrol, Umi Zoomi, Bubble Guppies, Mickey, and Little Einsteins.

You are really into books right now.  You've always been into them but you went through a little phase recently where it seemed like you weren't that into them.  Right now, you will bring us book after book and you actually sit and listen to the whole thing.  Before, you would usually be too interested in quickly turning the pages.  You love Dr. Seuss books.  You can practically recite Green Eggs and Ham.  

You like to cuddle in the mornings, which we love.

You love your grandparents and all of your family!  You are crazy about them.  You love to play with your cousins (amongst them, pretending to be so big) and I'm pretty sure your favorite thing in life is being at Mamaw & Papaw's house or Pappy & Gigi's & SoSo's /them being at your house.

You have started going with me to bible study once a week - which means you go to child care.  You also go to child care during church on the weekends.  Sometimes you cry/get sad when I/we drop you off, but you always end up playing and having a great time.  One time recently, you cried when I left you and then cried when I picked you up.  You didn't want to stay and then you didn't want to leave!

You love to color and paint.  You got an easel for Christmas and you love to color on it as well as in coloring books.

Speaking of colors, you know your colors and shapes!

You really like trucks/cars/trains - you are often driving them along furniture and letting them fall off the end, etc.  Or letting them fall off your brother's head.  Oy. ;)

You are, for the majority of the time, really good with Baby Brooks.  You two often play beside each other and you are usually willing to share and play in peace.  Every once in a while you get in a mood and will pick at him.  I would say that's normal.  Mostly, I'm really proud of how you are with him!

You are saying more and more all of the time.  You aren't really to the point of truly conversing...as in having back and forth conversation, but you know how to get your point across.  You say lots and lots of words.  You've never really been a parrot/repeater, but you are starting to do that more.  Better communication has led to fewer meltdowns/tantrums... although that still happens every once in a while. ;)

You still take one nap a day...but sometimes we forego nap so we can do an early bedtime - aka 7:30 pm.  You are generally pretty adaptable to either way.  You are still a great night sleeper and still in your crib, knock on wood.  You still sleep with your two blue blankies and your paci.  Not sure when we will attempt to get rid of the paci.

I think you are around 30 lbs.  You're pretty tall and skinny.  I'm not sure how tall you are but you are tall for your age it seems.  People often think you are older than you are and/or comment on how tall you are.  You wear a size 2T for the most part but are starting to get into 3T, especially for length.  You wear size 7 shoes but are almost in an 8.  You are still in size 4 diapers and a size 5 diaper overnight.  You sit on the potty occasionally, but you never actually go.  You went #2 once - when we could tell you were about to go and happened to get you on it in time. You are still pretty oblivious as far as telling us when you need to go/are going.  We just feel like you aren't ready and we are fine with that.  We don't want to torture ourselves and you by trying to make you do it when you aren't ready.  So right now we are just waiting and we're fine with it!

Weekend Recap

It has been a while since I did a weekend recap.  I would love to get back to doing it regularly but....well, two kids two and under.  That can be my excuse for everything, right? :)

Friday: Date Day! / Mamaw & Papaw came to watch the boys / Romano's Macaroni Grill was DELISH. / Shopped at TJ Maxx/Homegoods. / Got Gigi's cupcakes and went to Starbucks for coffee. / Not pictured: Shon got a haircut while I shopped around at a local children's consignment shop.

Smiley guy with (4) teeth.

Saturday: Boys played around nicely. / Holden acted like a weirdo. ;) / I got dressed! / Not pictured: We met up with my parents and sis at Red Lobster. / Dada left RL to go to work for the evening. / We all went to Target. / Pappy, Gigi, & SoSo came back to our house to visit for a while before heading home.

Sunday: Holden's breakfast. / Mama's coffee. / Boys eating waffles. / My breakfast from my perch on the couch. / Took the boys to church by myself since Shon had to work. / After church, Target again because it was cold and rainy and-I'm-sick-of-this-weather-and-what-else-is-there-to-do? We had popcorn and a soft pretzel for lunch.  Holden wouldn't share his popcorn, yet I had to share my pretzel.  With both of them. / I just recently discovered the clip-to-cart drink holders and yummy lime refresher. / Not pictured: Brooks fell asleep in Target and Holden fell asleep on way home so I detoured (to drive a little longer) and spent some time playing on my phone while sitting in a parking lot while they slept. / Back home where we read lots of books, ate cupcakes (Gigi & SoSo brought them the day before), snacked on Alpha-Bits cereal, and played around.  The boys did some major peaceful independent playing.  Winning. / The picture of Brooks with one sock on and one off was taken for that reason- this happens to him at least once a day, usually multiple times.  Always with the one sock on, one sock off.  And that's a bath paint thing he is holding, not deodorant.

It was a good weekend, minus the fact that we missed Dada for the latter half.

Brooks {10 Months}

Brooks turned 10 months on February 2nd!

At 10 months...

You have 4 teeth!  Your top two started coming in right at 10 months.  So in a month's time basically, you got your top two and bottom two teeth!  

You wear 9-12 month clothing.  12 month sleepers are getting to be necessary because of length.  You rarely wear shoes and when you do, they are 6-12 month soft sole shoes so I'm not sure what "real" size shoe you are in.  

You are in a size 3 diaper.  

Not any closer to walking.  You cruise along furniture still but don't stand alone.

You wave when we ask you to!  Clapping, waving, and dancing are your main tricks.  You dance to music a lot!  Even your brother singing causes you to dance.  So cute!  You seem to have a special affection for the Thomas theme song.

Sleep is the same.  Usually one nap.  Usually night sleep is from around 7:30-8 pm to 5 am.  I nurse you then and then put you back in your crib.  You have started to be okay with this most of the time and usually don't even cry which is wonderful!  Then you usually sleep for a few more hours.

We finally realized that you just hate baby food.  Feeding you was getting miserable - it was a battle.  So we started only giving you solids and you are happy as a clam.  You love to feed yourself.  Typical foods for you are puffs, mum mums, cheerios, bread, yogurt melts, scrambled eggs, pancakes, peas, and corn.  Those are the main staples, but you have also recently eaten turkey smoked sausage and loved it.  and have had pasta and random other things.  I tried giving you green beans recently and you didn't like them.  Same thing with pieces of (canned) pears.  (What?!) You liked avocado once but the next time I gave it to you, you didn't seem to like it.  Every once in a great while you will eat an applesauce pouch but that usually doesn't go over well either.  

You seem to be a tad more interested in a sippy cup but are still a long way from mastering it.

We are still going strong with nursing.  I don't keep track of how often you nurse but I know it's fairly often.  When you get fussy, nursing usually makes you happy again.  So we just do it whenever we need to!  

You've entered the "stranger danger" phase and prefer your Mama over anyone.  Even poor Dada gets the shaft if Mama's around.  When people try to talk to you when I'm holding you, you lay your head up against me and act very shy.  You will also smile and flirt at people - which is you being a major tease because you don't want to go to them at all.  If I am out of sight, you will usually warm up to people and be okay.  But if I'm in sight, it's all over.  It's very endearing and a little exhausting.

You are still in your infant seat.  If you fall asleep in it you will almost always stay asleep in it when we transfer you to a stroller or cart, etc. so it is still very valuable to us to keep you in it!  You have plenty of room and seem very comfy... it is just kind of comical because you are around 20 lbs. and your weight + the weight of the seat = very heavy to lug around!

One funny thing about you:  You often have one sock off.  I don't know why, but it seems like every time we turn around - there you are with one sock on and one sock off!  It makes us shake our heads and laugh. ;)

You've started making an almost hissing type of sound.  Hard to describe but it's one of your main noises.  Your other main noise is Dadadadada.  You're kind of a quiet baby for the most part I think.

You like to eat crayons.  We have to keep a close watch on those when big bro is using them.

You still like to be worn a lot, which I love about you.  Melts my heart!  You're just as content as can be when you're strapped up against me! :)

Brooks, you are just the sweetest thing.  You are still such a BABY to me which is why I have a super hard time understanding how you are only two months away from being a year old.  We love everything about you.  I just want to keep you a baby forever.